Sunday, March 31, 2013

Preschools: The seeds of time

By Nimrah Waseem
Source: "Dawn" (http://dawn.com/2013/03/31/preschools-the-seeds-of-time/)
 
Macbeth is told by a friend,
“You can look into the seeds of time,
And say which grain will grow and which will not,
Speak then to me …”

The symbolic use of the word ‘seed’ by William Shakespeare is embedded with several meanings. The quality of seeds is important but crops do not solely rely on it. Water supply, weather conditions and manure also play a role in obtaining a handsome harvest. Seeds symbolise children. We need to provide them with favourable conditions to grow.

Parents want to provide the best they can for their children. In order to give them a fine start they look for the best Montessori school in town. And in doing so they accede to pay illogically hefty fees. Some parents feel social pressure when the child’s cousins and other children in their neighbourhood are already going to a preschool. But most parents who seek admissions for their children in such institutions are rather ignorant of the physiological, social, emotional and academic needs of the little ones.

Karachi has numerous preschools; some of them claim to have foreign affiliations and promise to provide international standards. Others enounce that after passing out from their institution the child will get admission in the desired elite school.

In fact, only a couple of institutions in the city have an educational philosophy. Most of the preschools have only one Montessori directress and the rest of the teachers are just girls who hardly possess a Higher School Certificate. The school administration has nothing to do with education as they are there only to mint money.
These preschools do not hold a single standard procedure of admission. There is an admission test for the young buds along with their parents’ interview. To exhibit their so-called standards, they have an inflexible policy regarding the child’s age. Most of the schools open up admissions for 2.5-year-old children. A well-known Montessori school admits only 18 months old children while another admits children at the age of 2.3 years. But only those whose mothers registered with them when they were seven months pregnant are lucky to get into the school.

It is believed that early schooling will help children win the race in today’s competitive world. Parents do not realise that it can also have long-lasting effects on the future of their family. To decide the right age to start preschool, we should understand the needs of the child in the following domains of development.

Motor skill development

Motor skills are subdivided into two types; gross motor skills and fine motor skills. According to psychologist and philosopher Jean Piaget, these skills develop at a certain age and cannot be acquired before time.

Gross motor skill development is related to the child’s ability to use large muscles. Most importantly, a child should have the physical stamina to join preschool. Then, he must be potty-trained. Along with that, a child should be able to follow simple directions, walk in a straight line, eat his lunch and wash his hands without assistance. A majority of our children admitted to preschools do not have fully developed gross motor skills. This makes them unfit for the tough schedule and demands of the preschool as most of these schools are merely preparatory centres for further education and not proper montessories.

Fine motor skills develop more gradually. This is related to the child’s ability to use small muscles, specifically their hands and fingers, to pick up small objects, hold a spoon, turn pages in a book, or use a crayon to draw. A child having fully developed fine motor skills is able to handle scissors, dress up himself and tie shoe laces.

Children are unable to perform these tasks at the age of two-and-a-half years. They have slower reflex actions, lower level of distance judgment and hand-eye coordination. As mentioned already, these skills develop at a certain age and pressuring a child to perform these tasks would be disastrous.

For example, a child of 2.5 years can only use a crayon because the fine motor skills of his fingers are not completely developed and a pencil could damage some of them permanently. The hand-eye coordination also takes time to become perfect. When a child is pressurised by the teachers and parents to improve his handwriting and colouring, it simply builds on stress because he cannot perform better than that. Children under four have difficulties in the playground and at the swings for the same reason. Motor skills can become impaired in a variety of ways, including injury and illness. Later in their lives, they may have problems in riding a bike, in sports and making the right decisions when driving a car.

Speech and language development

A child should have the ability to clearly communicate his needs and understand others. For the purpose, a child should see himself as an individual and understand his place in the world. He must be able to join simple sentences together to describe an action or experience and hold a conversation. His language and cognitive abilities should be developed to the extent that he can participate in group activities. He should begin to understand that a story has a particular sequence, beginning, middle and an ending. One can easily guess that a child cannot do these things by the age of 2.5.

Cognitive development

As far as cognitive development and performance is concerned, Elizabeth Dhuey, a Canadian researcher, believes that “kids who begin classes later often perform better on tests later and are more likely to attend college.”

Social and emotional development

Let’s look at the most neglected area of social and emotional development. Parents think that their child will grow more sensible socially in the school environment. It is true but not for a child under four years of age. Actually, emotional development comes from the child’s interaction with his parents and family. Going to the market or outing or visiting relatives with the parents are experiences that not only add to the social and emotional intelligence, but expand the IQ as well.

Early schooling can be a risk factor because it asks so much of the kids. Preschool is not good for children under four years of age. Play groups are stressful no matter what as kids are stressed by the sensory overload, noise, difficulty of making their needs known to teachers, competition for grabbing attention, necessity of accommodating their own needs to the schedule, etc. Kay Margetts, a professor of early childhood studies at the University of Melbourne in Australia, says that if a child is not ready it could have “… devastating effects on his self-determination and progress.”

Children temporarily “transfer” their attachment focus from parents to the teachers. However, this relationship is not a secure attachment because of its “impermanent” nature. A child in parents’ company develops security and optimism whereas temporary separation from the mother during school hours may develop insecurity and mistrust. This mistrust exhibits itself mostly in teenage or sometimes even later than that.

Moreover, research tells us that children who are in preschool all day have high levels of cortisol and other stress hormones by the afternoon. Sometimes a child keeps himself composed during school hours but as soon as the parent appears after school, he bursts into tears. It reflects that he was passing through an emotional trauma earlier. Many early beginners compensate for the stress in other ways; they regress, they hit their siblings, they have bad dreams or they get clingier. Likewise, youngsters sent to day nurseries before the age of two are more likely to show signs of anti-social behaviour towards their teachers.

On the contrary, older children are able to manage their emotions. During play, they are able to take turns and engage in cooperative activities. The peer relationship skills help them to be socially active like entering a group of playing children.

According to famous psychologist Erik Erikson, the period of 18 months to four years is quiet critical for the child’s social and emotional development. “The well-parented child emerges from this stage sure of himself, elated with his new-found control, and proud rather than ashamed.” On the other hand, if a child is mishandled it, could lead to “… a psychological crisis that includes stormy self — will, tantrums, stubbornness, and negativism.”

Sociologist and psychologist agree that empathy is the most important social skill in terms of family bonding and social integrity. One becomes empathetic only if he is being treated empathically. No one can be empathetic more than a parent, not even teachers. So the most important social skill empathy is acquired in the parents’ company, not in school group situations. If this time is lost these young buds tend to be apathetic towards their parents and siblings later in their lives and we wonder what is wrong with our younger generation.

The writer is lecturer at the English department at the Federal Urdu University for Arts, Science and Technology, Karachi.

Sunday, January 13, 2013

Fear of Allah and His Punishment

By Saood Hashim

 

A few weeks back I had an interesting conversation with my elder daughter (of 8 years) with reference to some anger that I had shown to her that day due to some undesirable behavior of hers, and as a punishment not taking her to a decided outing. As a result she got a bit upset. But when her mood was back to normal I asked her whether she or her younger sister (of 3 years) feared me?

She immediately said, "No. We do not fear you."

I asked her the reason for it. She replied, "Because you are very nice and we love you and we know that you love us too".

But then I asked her the reason as to why they are not fearful of me even though I sometimes get angry on her and scold her much and even give her punishment. She couldn't give me a proper answer.

So I changed my question and asked her whether she thinks I will ever abandon her or her sister or let her be alone on the road or put her in some fire or give some other punishment just because I like to give punishments? She replied in the negative and then she started getting the feel of why she did not fear me even though I get angry on her. She realized that I get angry not because I like to get angry but because she does something bad which displeases me. And then I put it this way that "You do fear me, but that fear is NOT because I am some Jinn Bhoot etc. that will eat you up. You fear me because of our mutual LOVE for each other and therefore you do not want to make me unhappy. This Love asks you to be conscious of me. This consciousness tells you to do things that please me and to avoid things that displease me. Your fear of me is actually your consciousness of me. And your consciousness of me is because of this LOVE". She seemed to understand the difference between fear and consciousness (not completely though).

Then I asked her, "Are you fearful of Allah (swt)."

She said, "Yes."

I asked her why?

She said, "Because if I do not do something like Salah, Quran, etc., He will put me in fire."

I then asked her, "Do you think Allah likes to put you in fire?"

After some thought she said, "No."

"Then why do you fear Allah but not fear me even though both of us do not like to punish you?" I asked her. She remained silently thoughtful and did not come up with a ready answer.

I then explained to her that Allah is much much more loving than I am towards you and He will really dislike it very much to put any of His beautiful creation in Fire. Like you donot fear me but are conscious of me because I love you very much, donot fear Allah but be conscious of Allah, because He really loves you very much and we donot want to make him Unhappy by doing things which will displease Him.

Then I asked her what does she fear most - my displeasure or my punishment?

She said, "Your displeasure."

I asked her why? She said, "Because I don't want you to be displeased with me."

I said this goes same with Allah (swt). We should be fearful of Allah's displeasure more than his punishment. Because Allah many a times does not give any punishment even though it is already due because He LOVES us so much that he does not want us to be punished. But that does not mean that we should displease him by doing bad things again and again. It is only those who do bad things again and again that Allah will punish. For others, whoever repents and stops doing those bad things, Allah will become more loving.

I know my daughter has not yet understood this subject completely and she will have to take more lessons on this subject but I felt this conversation style was a good way to teach her about Allah and our relationship with Him.
In this context, it reminds me of the word "Taqwa". Generally the word "Taqwa" and "Muttaqi" are translated as "Fear of Allah" and "God-Fearing". I found a few translations of the Quran, for example Mohammad Asad and Sahih International which translate the word as "Consciousness of Allah" and "God-Conscious". I felt the later are better translations of these words. Fear of Allah at times tends to gives a negative meaning. Mohammad Asad has this to say when he translated the word "Muttaqi" as "God-Conscious"

"The conventional translation of muttaqi as "God-fearing" does not adequately render the positive content of this expression - namely, the awareness of His all-presence and the desire to mould one's existence in the light of this awareness; while the interpretation adopted by some translators, "one who guards himself against evil" or "one who is careful of his duty", does not give more than one particular aspect of the concept of God-consciousness."

Thursday, September 27, 2012

Homeschooling Means....

بِسْمِ اللَّهِ الرَّحْمَـنِ الرَّحِيمِ

- Home-schooling means biting your tongue/lip to stop yourself from smiling every time someone sees your children use HUGE kitchen scissors to comfortably cut up things and exclaims with horror, "Don't use those! They are dangerous for children!"

- Home-schooling means not speaking openly about your children's earlier-than-usual milestones and abilities and letting people assume they are lagging behind their schooled counterparts.

- Home-schooling means truly putting your trust in Allah, because your children's intelligence and achievements are not judged by standardized tests and report cards that "rate" the progress and academic excellence of a child on the faulty "cookie-cutter" system. You might not have report cards and numbers to satisfy you as a parent about your child's progress, but you DO have your own maternal instinct and gut feeling that lets you know via simple observation how intelligent your children are.

- Home-schooling means always remembering the things you disliked in your own childhood, and ensuring that these things don't happen to your own children. E.g. taking permission to go to the bathroom in front of the whole class, red-faced with embarrassment to announce your nature-call to the whole classroom; using a filthy school washroom without a door-lock, wishing no one comes in while you "go"; the immense hurt and burning tears caused by being scolded harshly in front of 25 other kids and kicked out of class because you were making an artistic card for your teacher whilst she was teaching something else (which you found very boring); being forced to go to school when you are sick, when all you want to do is stay in the comfort of your home with your mother and play with your toys.

- Homeschooling means never forcing your children to study the Quran when they want to do something else. Result? They come after you, asking you to teach them the Quran (as well as other books, e.g. Science books!).

- Home-schooling means having a child with an open book/pencil standing at the kitchen counter next to you as you chop vegetables and cook at the stove, giving them directions and checking their work. Through this experience, the child simultaneously learns about cooking and your recipes. :)

- Home-schooling means feeling a rush of emotional "pride" and tears of joy well up in your eyes when, on coming out of your room, you see your children lined up, with one loudly leading a "mock" salah (with perfect recitation ماشاء الله لا قوة الا بالله), and the other following willingly (May Allah reward the people at Al-Huda for making the "Thank You Allah" cassette, in which Asma Zubair has taught the salah in a way that is fun to learn and so easy to memorize) - and secretly observing them perform this salah perfectly as a part of their "play", without anyone forcing them to.

- Home-schooling means enjoying your children's childhood and letting them enjoy it too; enjoying their company to the full, knowing that one day they will be all grown up and gone; remembering that your house will then be empty and they will insha'Allah be in their own homes, enjoying blissful matrimony with their own spouses and children (may Allah grant them every blessing of this duniya and the next, ameen).

- Home-schooling means passing by huge brick buildings and feeling grateful to Allah as a family that my little treasures are not "trapped" inside it 5 mornings a week against their will, but rather, are "free" to wake up when they want to, have a leisurely breakfast, and to know that their mother is nearby always to run crying to, and to play all they want! I can list many negatives as well, but I am thankful to Allah that for us, the positives of homeschooling by far outnumber the negatives.

- May Allah grant us protection from harm, and even more fruition and barakah in our endeavors. Ameen

-- By Sadaf Farooqi

Sunday, May 27, 2012

The White Tiger


My 4-and-a-half year old son Sabeeh is constantly talking about this “white tiger”, along with his sister and cousins who had accompanied him at the mini zoo (…ok, a micro-zoo) somewhere in Nazimabad, Karachi.

But there is something about this white-tiger that the kids are not easily forgetting! I looked it up and found that this white-tiger is usually smaller in size than the original tigers that Sabeeh has seen on documentaries before, he has also seen other animals… doing things that are very exciting for kids to remember and they’d talk about it for at least a day or two… and then forget about it.There was a moment when…t hey were all standing by its cage…and turned their back towards the cage for a moment and it tried to… either attack or just jump on the grill and some of kids had a mixed feeling of fear and excitement along with a chorus of screams and laughter, they really loved it!

May be its THIS particular event that they are not letting it go. “Baba… uss nay AISAY jump kiaa… aur wo… AISAY bhag raa thaa!”…You know how 4 year olds like to do the…s how and tell… the exciting tone with almost ALL body parts giving their share of gestures!

It made me wonder why this experience has so much impact compared to the very interesting documentaries they had been watching. Why this event is SO… interesting to remember when so many times in so many documentaries… so many animals have jumped on the camera… have done amazing things that a child doesn’t easily forget!

A discussion with some friends… experts of communications, school teachers made me conclude that it’s basically the effect that a REAL LIFE EXPERIENCE leaves at a person, the combined impact of all the 5 senses (or at least 4 in this case, as the children didn’t ‘taste’ anything at the mini-zoo :]) and the deductive ideas generated by input given by these 5 senses within that situation leaves an impression that is incomparable to that of a documentary by even the best multimedia system today.

The urban lifestyle today have kept us away from some of the real life experiences and I am now looking for ways for kids to learn from real life…also, because I realize its actually EASY, and because its…well…REAL.

A small experiment to work on children’s vocabulary using a door, yes… a door! In my house proved to be pretty successful…I just took them to one of the doors in the house and showed them the “handle”, “lock”, “frame” and kind of made up a small story to keep using all the vocabulary about the parts of the door and it was pretty easy for Sabeeh and his Sister to later recall these things ... I’d say…I didn’t have to do practically ANY effort to make them remember it!

I’m now planning to take the kids to a relative’s house at the “University of Karachi” that happens to have some trees…well…whatever’s left of it after expansion of different cemented structures, some small gardens (in fact I have heard a great deal of a garden near the Botany department…obviously!) where…I’m thinking of trying to teach Sabeeh and his sister “colors” in different plants and their flowers, work on their “vocabulary” by SHOWING them the things they read about.

I’d like to know what the experienced home-scholars have to say about this to a newbie, anything and everything that may add value…?

wassalamalikum
Umair

Monday, May 21, 2012

The Positives and Negatives of Home Schooling

Re-posted from: http://dalishah.com/2012/05/15/the-positives-and-negatives-of-home-schooling-by-safiyah/

By Safiyah, a homeschooler in Islamabad (Safiyah is 12 and is a gifted writer and all-round awesome human being. She loves horseriding and can read a book in world record speed.)

POSITIVES OF HOMESCHOOLING

In my experience of home schooling there are many, many positives next to almost no negatives, so to me, home schooling is the only option I would willingly accept.

No exams Take away that horrible stress and the overwhelming struggle not to just look over at someone else’s sheet for the answers. The feeling that your insides have suddenly become an endless void is gone, and you don’t even have to worry about teachers patrolling with their creepy eagle-eyes.

Focus on your own character I know I used to wonder whether I should act more like the other kids in class. I didn’t make many friends because I was a little strange, and if I did it was because I was from Australia. In home schooling, you don’t need to look at other kids wondering if they’re better than you; just look at yourself and appreciate it. I find myself enjoying the qualities of myself that my old schoolmates found weird because it means I’m not the same as everyone else.

You can pay attention Did you ever find it hard to focus on what the teacher was saying while all the kids were either trying as hard as you were, finding ways to keep themselves busy, or trying to communicate with their friends? I know I did. There was a rare time when I understood a whole sentence the teacher said, and I’d struggle later to figure it out by myself. I wouldn’t bother asking the teacher to re-explain it, since she’d only get mad and ask why I didn’t pay attention. In home schooling, you don’t have to be afraid of saying you didn’t understand, and there aren’t any kids to distract you (except if you have annoying siblings like me!).

Think for yourself – At school, we used to copy the answers to the questions in our books off what the teacher wrote on the board, then memorize it for the exams, and not actually use our brains. But now, my mum makes us do whole projects by ourselves, getting the information off the internet and reading it over carefully to understand. This way, we have to understand it, because you can’t put together a project without understanding what you’re doing.

Use your creativity – I remember, we used to have to draw something exact for the teacher and if it wasn’t good enough, she’d tell us to make another one. The good thing about projects is that you can decorate it yourself and use your creativity to make it into something beautiful to make it more enjoyable to read.

No more worry for homework – Now that I don’t have homework anymore, I find myself being able to do so many more things! Computer games, yes, but even computer games get boring after a while. So I practice my drawing skills, my writing skills and I read a lot.

NEGATIVES OF HOMESCHOOLING

There are a few slight downfalls of home schooling, but they don’t matter to me much.

Comforts – At school, you didn’t have all your comforts around you; couches, TV, beds, laptops, etc. So, it’s kinda hard to get into the groove of ignoring how much you just want to relax and get on with school.

No schoolkids – Without all your fellow classmates, you get pretty antisocial, or, for people like my brother who need friends, you go crazy. I was never a very social person, but now home schooling made me prefer to stay in my room even when my sister leaves because my family’s slightly boring to talk to, since they know all the things I might talk about; which is why it might be a good idea to live near friends.

Your mother as a teacher – If your mother is your teacher, it’s kinda hard to take her seriously sometimes. I found myself more afraid of teachers than my mother, because my mother’s just so familiar while they’re almost like strangers telling you what to do. It takes some getting used to.

Distractions – You may think all the distractions will be gone, like the kids and the horrible working atmosphere, but you could be wrong. You actually find yourself looking for distractions. Get a glass of water, torment the cat, act like you’re not listening, they’re all distractions that my siblings and I try. Of course, there’s no fooling your mother…

So, that’s all the majors (let me tell you, there are not many minors), but we’ll end it here so it doesn’t get too long. Thanks for reading!

Homeschooling for Purpose

Re-posted from blog of a Danielle Ali Shah (a homeschooling mom in Pakistan)
http://dalishah.com/2012/05/20/homeschooling-for-purpose/#more-282

Why do we take our kids out of school? The most common reason I have heard is that schools do not treat our children as individuals with their own learning paths… they produce battery chickens who are all fed the same thing and produce homogenous learning.

So if this is the case, how do we nurture that individualism of our kids at home? Of course we will be with them more so can see their own strengths and weaknesses, but if we are just teaching a standard curriculum at home as well, how is it better than school?

I believe that one of the huge benefits of homeschooling can be that we have a unique opportunity to nurture our kids to grow into their PURPOSE.

If you want to build a ship, don’t drum up people to collect wood and don’t assign them tasks and work, but rather teach them to long for the endless immensity of the sea. — Antoine de Saint-Exupery

Purpose is a divine thing… and something that 99% of people travel through life without grasping. I am blessed to have my husband as my teacher in this, and he says that we all have glimpses of our purpose when we are young but that life, parents, expectations etc crowd in upon this and so often we lose touch with it. But it is always there … a longing like the longing for the sea that Saint Exupery talks of. My husband says, and I agree with him completely, that once you know your purpose, you don’t need to do anything else but wait for the opportunities to come to live that purpose. And they will come without effort or stress. When you know your purpose, life will flow.

So as homeschooling parents what can we do to nurture our children to find their purpose? Well what we shouldn’t do is add our own values and expectations on our children. This is where unschooling comes into its own I think. It is a way that kids can go in their own direction with love and support.
I found this great article below and am thinking about developing some activities around this with my kids… perhaps some drawing and writing. The challenge is always to nurture without directing, so let’s see how it goes! I would love to hear your thoughts about how we can nurture purpose in our children.

http://thinksimplenow.com/happiness/life-on-purpose-15-questions-to-discover-your-personal-mission/

Saturday, May 19, 2012

Homeschooling the ‘not so still’

Re-posted from a blog of a Pakistani homeschooling mother:
http://javeria.wordpress.com/2012/05/19/homeschooling-the-not-so-still/

Young kids 2 -6 year olds are very restless, have very low attention spans and get very very easily distracted. I am talking about majority of the kids this age, there are,however always a few exceptions. So HOW to homeschool such kids.

This was one the major issue which I faced and was the only factor stopping me from taking the homeschooling plunge.

At home, my daughter hardly stays still, is very easily distracted, talks ALOT,would speak to complete strangers who came into the house.. electrician.. plumber, would confidently speak and ask questions from complete strangers in shops, clinics and every where she went…she would throws things, tears up books at times, she couldn’t stand any poster/ paper etc put up on walls, fridge magnets never stayed on the fridge, toys and books never on the shelf..in one word.. everything would be on the floor.( Alhamdulilah some of it has changed now)

But when she went to school for four months… Viola!she turned into a totally miss goody two shoes, listening,obeying and following instructions, she was reserved, calm and quiet and hardly spoke..she was considered under confident.

So why this completely opposite personality in school and at home? I was perplexed. John Holts book How Children Fail and How Children learn made me realize the fear factor of schools, which I realized, must be greatly amplified for kids soo young. As Saffiyah…a 12 year old homeschooler who recently began her homeschool points out
“I found myself more afraid of teachers than my mother, because my mother’s just so familiar while they’re almost like strangers telling you what to do.”
So when a 12 year old could be more afraid of her teacher ..how much fear would be in the hearts of a young little 2.5 year old! Just imagine..sending them to school would be cruel!

When I was unable to make my daughter sit still, grab her attention and make her do her school workbook , coloring inside the shape, remembering numbers etc I was upset and asked other mothers and did a lot of research on the net and this is what I have realized.

Young kids don’t need a rigid routine nor a fixed set curriculum, they need not be taught how to add, read or write and this article hits the nail on the head! More over, our deen ..which provides us instruction in every area of life,guides us regarding teaching the Salah to children, that it should be started at the age of 7 . There is also a saying attributed to Ali (r) [I couldn't find a reference] that :
Play with your child the first 7 years, Discipline Your Child the next 7 years and then Befriend your child the following 7 years.
So according to our deen, the first seven years are for play and fun without a rigid routine/curriculum or forced teaching of complex things. However, most schools these days take in children at the age of 2.5 and subject them to forced routine of waking up early,travelling to school, being punctual, even when they are unwell (flu, fever, cold) which is likeley to be most of the time! then by the age of four they are expected to read, do math or other complex stuff.

Interestingly in this article titled ‘Much to Early’, the author argues that very young children need not be tutored to understand complex things, because children are only able to do ‘concrete operations’ such as multiplication, addition subtraction at the age of six or seven and reading is a much more complex process than arithmetic, so forcing them to recall alphabets which are merely abstract symbols is like placing a tough burden on them. Surprisingly in this article, a behavioral and developmental Pediatrician explains that the brain only gets ready for reading between the age of 4-7 years! she explains the physiological reasons why we should not be teaching pre-school children to write, read, and spell at such an early age as it will create learning problems in the future. This article really is a MUST read as it gives us the underlying reason for not ‘schooling’ children at such a young age.

So parents of such young children should ‘chill’ and relax and not worry if their child is not reading or counting or adding or even if they dont know their alphabets. Just have fun with them, play games and do things they like doing. If they don’t color inside the shape…give them blank sheets to color where ever they wish, they want to color the sky red.. let them..they dont want to read…leave them alone..they dont want to count..leave them alone, let them be kids. Every child develops at a different pace, they each learn to flip over, crawl and walk at their own pace, the parent needs to find out when their child is ready for structured learning of complex things, try it out and if you find our child anxious, more restless and not enjoying the activity.. leave it and do what they enjoy doing. There is joy in learning, not jitters. I am going to quote two very important paras from this paediatrician.
Children can’t learn and neurological pathways can’t form as easily when children’s nervous systems are experiencing stress. Forcing children to write, read, and spell, and giving them “standardized” tests before they are developmentally ready, will stress their nervous systems. Furthermore, children will dislike reading and will not want to go to school. If we insist on pushing writing, reading and spelling before the children’s minds are ready, we will continue to create an epidemic of behavior and learning difficulties, especially in our boys.

Activities like imaginary play, climbing, running, jumping, hopping, skipping, walking the balance beam, playing circle games, singing, playing catch, doing meaningful chores, painting, coloring, playing hand-clapping games, doing string games, and finger knitting will strengthen their minds for learning. Children need these healthy, harmonious, rhythmic, and noncompetitive movements to develop their brains. For it is the movements of their body that create the pathways in their mind for reading, writing, spelling, mathematics, and creative thinking. (Susan Johnson,M.D, Teaching Our Children)